If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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