your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
