butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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