Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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