They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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