i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
