Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Randomize
