To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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