I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
