No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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