he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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