are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Randomize
