ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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