Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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