this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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