thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize