their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
