with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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