is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
