He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
