I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
