Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
