Walk of Shame. In a state park.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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