Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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