great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize