absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
