You can't special order awesome
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
