It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
