Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
We don't watch enough power rangers
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
