found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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