Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
