Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
