So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
