you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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