do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I deserve this hangover.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
