so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
