I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
