NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
