ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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