no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
