And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
