im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Randomize
