How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
