he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Randomize
