just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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