Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
