If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
