Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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