Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
