I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
